Hell

The following is supposedly an actual question given on a University of Washington chemistry mid-term. The answer by one student was so"profound" that the professor shared it with colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of course, why we now have the pleasure of enjoying it as well.

Bonus Question:
Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)?

Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law(gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some variant.

One student, however, wrote the following:
First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. Sowe need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate at which they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the different Religions that exist in the world today. Most of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there is more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell. With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added.This gives two possibilities:
1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose.
2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over.
So which is it? If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman year that, "it will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you, and take into account the fact that I slept with her last night, then number 2 must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and has already frozen over. The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over, it follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is therefore, extinct...leaving only Heaven thereby proving the existence of a divine being which explains why, last night, Teresa kept shouting "Oh my God."

THIS STUDENT RECEIVED THE ONLY "A"

(E-Mail from Andreas Lim)

LTB - Lucky Plaza Con Man

I wanted to buy a Blackberry Bold at Lucky Plaza #B1-63 Megatronics Photo on 21 February 2009. At first they agree for $700 and they swipe my debit card for $975.35 and ask me to sign while covering the amount. Luckily, I see the amount first before signing so I did not want to sign. and they force me to sign because they already pasted the screen protector. I had quite a fight for about 15 min with shouting in front of the store (many past-by people watching). They told me to call police but I asked them to call instead as I do not want to call 999 as it is for emergency only. He even said wait until the end of the month and settle the case after the bank deduct my money(meaning he want to go to Law Case). In the end I manage to get out of the store, I called Citibank to check the transaction (Citibank cannot do anything and told me to wait until the next day). So, I find Security and he said many cases like this happens in Lucky Plaza, he informed me to call the nearest police station. After the police came, we went to the store and the police told the store to void the transaction. But, the store insisted, I pay the $10 screen protector he pasted. I said I bought everything for $710, but he did not want to sell as now he wanted to sell it for $900. I paid the $10 just not to lost $975.35. The police informed me to call CASE. I called a couple places like CASE, CAD, Singapore Tourism Board and Small Claim Tribunal (I did not call Small Claim Tribunal as it is already a LAW case).

TIMING

1. 13.18pm (Store swipe my card)
2. 13.26pm (I call Citibank)
   
3. 13.35pm (Store void my card) {They actually void my card after I call Citibank instead of the police, but I did not know they already voided it}
   
4. 13.57pm (I call Police)
5. 14.30pm (Police at the store)
6. 14.35pm (Police informed me about CASE)

LESSON TO BE LEARN or LESSON I LEARN

• Pay using Nets or Cash, instead of Debit Card or Credit Card for expensive item (as Nets you can unauthorize the transaction without your PIN, whereas Debit Card or Credit Card, the transaction still go through even you did not sign it)
  

Movies & Quotes - Suite Life of Zack & Cody

Quitters never win, Winners never quit. (Cody from Suite Life Of Zack & Cody - Season 1 Episode9); Please visit http://www.youtube.com/taubing and find my playlists for Suite Life Of Zack & Cody AND Suite Life On Deck.

LTB - SIA Cadet Pilot 2

I was not accepted for the Cadet Pilot as they said that I am not prepared for the interview and need to understand more about airplanes. I will try again next time :}

LTB - SIA Cadet Pilot

Later in the morning at 8.45AM, I will be interview for SIA Cadet Pilot. I am kind of nervous yet excited about the interview. I am hoping I do well during the interview :}

LTB - SPS

My school (Saint Patrick's Secondary School), I had lots of nice memory in this school. I studied here for 4 years (1996-1999). It is the best time of my life (Just like my Biology teacher, Miss Shiva, told us that it will be your best years in your life, so cherish it) :}

LTB - Chicken Rice Stall

Chicken Rice is considered one of the most popular food in Singapore, the other one is Mee Pok (a wide yellow noodle). I eat at this stall very often. There are other popular foods too like Mee Siam, Laksa, Chicken Curry, Curry Puff and many others...

LTB - Birds

The Birds that flocked around near my house.Yup, you see it right it is about 20-30 of them and they come here every night to rest :)

Unfortunately, they shit all over the place, there will be shits all over the place by the morning. So be careful when crossing under them, they seems to aim their butt at you. Haha :} they will laugh when they hit you right on your head. I will usually walk the long way around to escape the disaster. By the way, I was hit once on my shoulder :(

LTB - Oven Chicken

ummm.... Yummy, it is my first time cooking a chicken using an oven :)

Chicken still inside the oven

Jokes - Ferrari/Porsche/Porch

Hal's handyman was not the swiftest guy on earth. But he was cheap, and so was Hal, which is why he hired the guy to paint his porch for $50.
"You tightwad," scolded Hal's wife. "Our porch covers half of the house! He'll be there for days." Hal simply smirked.
An hour later, there was a knock at the door. The handyman had finished.
"How did you get done so quickly?" Hal asked.
"It was a piece of cake," the handyman replied. "Oh, and it's a Ferrari, not a Porsche."
(Author Unknown)

Jokes - Job Application

My buddy applied for a job as an insurance salesperson. Where the form requested "prior experience," he wrote "lifeguard." That was it. Nothing else.
"We're looking for someone who can not only sell insurance, but who can sell himself,"said the hiring manager. "How does working as a lifeguard pertain to salesmanship?"
"I couldn't swim," my pal replied.
He got the job. (Tedd C. Huston)

Jokes - boys will be boys

There was a knock at the door. It was a small boy, about five years old. Something of his had found its way into my garage , he said, and he wanted it back. Upon entering the garage door, I noticed two additions: a baseball and a broken window sporting a baseball-size hole.
"How do you suppose this ball got in here?" I asked.
Taking one look at the ball, one look at the window and one look at me, the boy exclaimed, "Wow! I must have thrown it right through that hole." (Bruce Radomski)

Jokes - Punjabi Airlines

"Good morning, Ladies and Gentlemen. This is your captain Banta Singh
welcoming you to Punjab Airways. We apologize for the four day delay in
taking off, owing to bad weather and some overtime I had put in at the
bakery.

This is flight one-two-six to New Delhi. Landing in Delhi is not
guaranteed, but we will end up somewhere in the East. And if luck is in our
favour, we may even be landing on your village!

Punjab Airways has an excellent record for safety. In fact our safety
standards are so high that even the terrorists are afraid to fly with us!
It is with pleasure I announce that starting this year over 50% of our
passengers have reached their destination.

For the ones that don't quite make it, Punjab Airways staff have all the
requisite  experience for consoling the next-of-kin. Our Stewardess,
Bubbly, will be happy to brief you on our out of court settlement policies.

If our engines are too noisy for you, on passenger request, we can arrange
to turn them off. To make your free fall to earth pleasant and memorable,
we serve tea and biscuits. For our religious passengers, we are the only
airline who can help you find out if there really is a God.

We regret to inform you, that today's in-flight movie will not be shown as
we forgot to record it from the television. But for our movie buffs, we
will be flying right next to Air India, where their movie will be visible
from the right side window of the cabin.

There is no-smoking in this airplane. Any smoke you see in the cabin is
only the early warning system of the engines telling us to slow down. Life
jacket are positioned under your seats and free bathing costumes are made
available to the aunties and swimming shorts to the uncles, for emergency
jumps.

In order to catch important landmarks, we try to fly as close as possible
for the best view. If, however, we go a little too close do let us know.
Our enthusiastic co-pilot sometimes flies right through the landmark.

Kindly be seated, keep your seat in an upright position for take off and
fasten your belt. For those of you who can't find a seat belt, kindly
fasten your own belt to the arm of your seat. And for those of you who
can't find a seat, do not hesitate to get in touch with a flight attendant
for your suitcase.

Sorry, but I won't be flying with you today because I have to attend my
nephew's wedding. But please make yourself at home and help yourself to the
cock pit.

Thank you for choosing Punjab Airways. HAVE A NICE JOURNEY."


(Email from my Secondary School's friend - Aloysius Ang)

Parent's Wish (Author Unknown)

To our dear child:

On the day when you see us old, weak and weary...
Have patience and try to understand us...

If we get dirty when eating...
If we can not dress on our own...
Please bear with us and remember the times we spent feeding and dressing you up.

If, when we speak to you, we repeat the same things over and over again...
Do not interrupt us... Listen to us.
When you were small, we had to read to you the same story a thousand and one times until you went to sleep.

When we do not want to have a shower, neither shame nor scold us...
Remember when we had to chase you with your thousand excuses to get you to the shower?

When you see our ignorance of new technologies...
Help us navigate our way through those world wide webs.

We taught you how to do so many things...
To eat the right foods, to dress appropriately, to fight for your rights...

When at some moments we lose the memory or the thread of our conversation...
Let us have the necessary time to remember...
And if we cannot, do not become nervous...
As the most important thing is not our conversation but surely to be with you and to have you listening to us...

If ever we do not feel like eating, do not force us.
We know well when we need to and when not to eat.

When our tired legs give way and do not allow us to walk without a cane.
Lend us your hand. The same way we did when you tried your first faltering steps.

And when someday we say to you that we do not want to live any more, that we want to die.
Do not get angry. Some day you will understand.
Try to understand that our age is not just lived but survived.

Some day you will realize that, despite our mistakes,
We always wanted the best for you
And we tried to prepare the way for you.

You must not feel sad, angry nor ashamed for having us near you.
Instead, try to understand us and help us like we did when you were young.

Help us to walk...
Help us to live the rest of our life with love and dignity.
We will pay you with a smile and by the immense love
We have always had for you in our heart.

We love you, child.
Mom and Dad

(Special Thanks to Parent's Wish)

The Meaning of Life? (From the internet)

What most people need to learn in life is how to love people and use things instead of using people and loving things. (Unknown)

There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle. (Albert Einstein)

The greatest mistake you can make in life is to be continually fearing you will make one. (Elbert Hubbard)

The Meaning of Life?

I asked quite a lot of people regarding the question: "What is the meaning of Life?" and found three very interesting answers:

1. Life is what you want it to be: you want it to be happy, it will be happy and you want it to be sad, it will be sad. (Miss Amerjied, my high school tuition teacher "Hope I spell the name right")
2. Life is the art of drawing without an eraser. (John W. Gardner - I saw it in a movie) so if you make a mistake you could not erase it, but to go on with your life and make it more beautiful by correcting and continuing drawing.
3. Life is like a Vacuum Cleaner, It Sucks. (My Secondary School Friend-forgotten his Name)

Please Comments :)

Quotes - Life

Live every day like it's your last, 'cause one day you're gonna be right. (Ray Charles in Esquire)

Jokes - Simulation Game

I overheard my nine-year-old son on the phone with a friend discussing a computer simulation game. The game involved creating a family, a house for them to live in, and so on. My son, an old hand at the game, gave this warning: "Whatever you do, don't get kids. They don't bring in any money, and all they do is eat!" (Nicole Kauling)

SHOCK

While I was driving a large and dry tree branch broke and fell on my car windshield. It shocked me that I had to stop and cleaned the broken branch from the car as it was broken into smaller pieces and covered the whole front windshield. Luckily I was driving very slowly and nothing bad happens :}

HSR Property Agent

I also accepted a job at HSR Property Agent, it has no salary but commission based. Hope I could sell one or more along the way :)

Canon 980IS

I just bought my camera (Canon 980IS), because my work needed a camera. I think it is quite a good camera, maybe I will post more pictures in the future. I also bought TOTO (Singapore Lottery) as the winning draw is S$10Million. WOW.....

Parkway Parade Mall

Nothing much being done today, I went to ParkWay Parade Mall to eat fried "Kuetiaw" (a type of noodle). Later in the evening I cleaned my bike thoroughly, it took me about 3 hours. I am gonna use it soon :)